Last Sunday and Monday were two of the most difficult nights in this journey. The pain and coughing were such that I could not sleep. Nor could Dee, who has dedicated herself through these months to meet my needs. By morning, we were exhausted when our Hospice nurse came by. She encouraged us to consider the option of Hos-pice in-patient care at one of their facilities, where openings were not often available. It didn’t take long to make our decision and, by noon, we were situated in the beautiful St. Francis home in Nuuanu.
It was amazing. Kind people received us and, within hours, brought wonderful relief as they addressed my needs. Gratefulness to God filled our hearts through the day. That evening, Rocky dropped by and asked Dee, “Did you see what was outside?” Then he told us that Anadara, early that morning, had prayed asking the Lord for a specific sign that God’s grace was upon us. Immediately, we thought, How could the answer to that prayer be any more clear than what had happened that day? Rocky then pulled out his phone to show us what he’d just seen walking to the facility.
What can you say to that but, “Thank You, Lord!”? What a gracious God! Reflecting that night on the events of that day, guilt began to creep into my heart as I considered how blessed we were by the level of care now available to us. I thought of the myriads of people from Kaimuki to the ends of the earth suffering in silence or agony with no options like I was enjoying.
I sensed the Lord speaking to me that guilt was not the proper response to His gifs. Rather, gratitude should be translated into caring for those He loves. What could I do? I couldn’t “do something” for them. Wait. I could pray! I could pray more for people suffering; those we know and those we won’t meet this side of Heaven. As I did so, the “false guilt” from the enemy who wants to steal God’s glory lifted. I was able to give the Giver of gracious gifts the praise He deserved!